Hey there everyone! Well here i am at 11pm posting our first discussion topic when i had planned on doing it earlier today, guess thats the life of a mom and no need to explain anymore bc i know u know exactly what i am talking about:)
I thought for our first discussion we would talk about good ole......vasectomies, dun dun dun...lol.
I guess one reason is that its been heavy on my heart since we found out that we were pregnant for the 4th time and only have 1 living baby. Jarrell wants to stop after this one is born(Lord willing) and healthy. We have been through a lot, all of it has brought us closer not only in our marriage but in our relationships with the Lord, but we are still heart broken from missing our 2 unborn babies and not sure if we want to risk going through losing anymore:(
Please dont get me wrong, we trust in the Lord and know that it was his plan to take those children and would never question him for that. Although we dont understand it, we know he will be able to tell us one day. We are soo thankful that we were able to have Titus and everything went really smoothly in my pregnancy with him and he is now a healthy 2 year old.
So anyway, not to get really serious with everyone, as some of you may not even know we have been through this in the past 4 years, but now you do.
My question for you is, what do you think about vasectomies? We are only 24 and 26 and will have had 2 children, when do you think is a good age to make it a permanent thing to not have anymore? What would you do in our situation?
Cant wait to hear your comments! God bless you all!
*p.s. if you want to know anything about what we have been through, please dont hesistate to ask, i dont mind talking about it and didnt mean to not elaborate on it, i just didnt want this post to be too long as i know you still have to comment and we all have little ones, husbands, etc. to attend to:)
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I don't think there is a good age to get it done. I don't think age really has anything to do with it. The decision is one that will be made after much discussion between a husband and wife. There will of course be many contributing factors in deciding to get it done or to not get it done. I can't say 100% what I would do in your situation as I have not been through what you have, but I think I would likely do the same. It has to be hard when you've lost a child to try again knowing that you could miscarry again and have to suffer the loss of another baby. The decision to have a vasectomy is one that you have to be completely ready for. You have to be willing to accept that you won't be having any more children (unless you get It reversed, which is expensive) and be okay with that. Only you and your husband can decide together if you are truly ready. If you aren't 100% ready or even have the slightest doubt about It take the time to think more until you are 100% ready. In the end you will know which choice will be best for your family :)
ReplyDeleteThanks nat! Your comment really made me think, i am going to talk to jarrell more and like you said, if we arent 100% sure i think we should wait. Thanks for much for your advice i really take everything you say to heart and appreciate it. :)
ReplyDeleteWe have also had this discussion, although have not been through the same as you. Alfred and I have always said we would like at least two children. He really wants to stop after 2 and I am not quit sure. We are just now starting to discuss baby number two so I think when that happens we will discuss the vasectomy further. I can tell you this though, he will be the one getting the vasectomy instead of me getting my tubes tied, its only fair. LOL!
ReplyDeleteI am always nervous about permanently closing that door. Not that there is anything wrong with having it done, but I know several people who were so sure that they were done and were then several years later ready for another one. I was going to get my tubes tied after Logan and even though I know (especially since I am already 31) I won't want another, I was too scared to completely rid myself of capability.
ReplyDeleteYour welcome Lacey :)
ReplyDeleteHi
ReplyDeleteI am also on my fourth pregnancy but with one living child...and by God's grace is a very healthy and happy child. I'm due next month and have had a normal pregnancy so far. Though you,Lacy,have been through the same thing you have kept a positive mindset, increased your faith and dependence on God, and have encouraged others. Seeing you have such a good attitude all the time has helped me keep my attitude in check and I thank you for that.
As far as vasectomies go- I'd have to agree with Natalie in that it's totally up to the parents. I'd be sure to pray about it for a while before making that big descicion though.
Lacey, I agree with Brit that you have been such an encouragement and testimony of faith through your hardships! I haven't had to go through a miscarriage, but I know it is heartbreaking. I remember when my mom did, it was very hard for her...my parents later decided to have a vasectomy also to keep from going through it again (she had two miscarriages). However, it was later in life and we have a big family. I agree with the other girls that it is something personal for you and Jarrell to pray about and make sure you are both 100% positive that it's what you want to do. You have such a precious little family, God will take care of you and give you peace about your decision as you seek Him. Blessings to you guys!
ReplyDeleteHey Lacey! I agree with the other girls. I would definitely pray about it and make sure that is what you all really want, and it's what God wants for you. I could understand how hard it must be to lose a little one. My sister got hers done when she had her second child. She had horrible pregnancies- sick every day for all 9 months. When she had her first child the baby got stuck so they had to do a c-section. After that, her and her husband decided to wait 5 years before the next one and ended up getting pregnant within the next year. With that one, she was suppose to have another c-section for safety reasons and the nurse checked her wrong, thinking she was dialated to a 2, when really she was at a 9... she couldn't have any pain medication at all and had to deliver naturally. With all of that said, she decided to have one done. She was 25 at the time. She says now that she knows she made the right decision because she doesn't think she could handle another pregnancy. Don't get me wrong, she loves her girls! Just the being pregnant and actually delivering was very hard on her. I still say, pray about it and wait to see what God tells you do to. I will be praying for you in your decision. I know you and Jarrell are wonderful parents and will make the right decisions. Hope you are feeling well with this pregnancy!! :)
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